looking back

We went and saw chase's parents last night at linden house for dinner- it was awesome to get to see them and i think it made the week a little easier on us all. it i honestly can't believe that it has been three years already since he has been gone- it seems like yesterday and forever ago all at once and it still sucks. bad. i still wonder what it would be like if he were still around, but maybe things would be exactly the same except him being gone. Its crazy how much things have changed in the last three years- zach and i have gotten engaged, married, moved, and had a baby since he has been gone- i have graduated from college, gotten a job and gone from a life of college parties and sorority life to something a bit more grown up- something I feel like he helped to shape my grownup life even after he was gone- I guess he is at least part of the reason I became an ER nurse- always hoping to just save at least one life... i still remember the night it all happened so clearly, waiting in the ER for news, but it also feels like a dream. I still miss you!

It was nice to get to introduce Sawyer to M and V and he helped keep the mood light. He did pretty good through dinner and v held him for me so i actually got to eat with two hands! And the food was soooo good! I always feel so happy after we get to see them. We were naughty parents though and ended up staying later than we should have talking with m and v and sawyer got sooo tired and threw a fit in the car on the way home- I was the dd as usual and zach could not get him to chill out almost the whole way home- im pretty sure he scares b and k out of ever having children when he melts down like that...

Its funny, zach bought the corvette the month after the accident and now here it is three years later and he is trying to sell it- we no longer have good use for a two seater car..since there are three of us now. And there may be three of us in the family now-plus cooper- but we dont legitimately need three vehicles- even though zach says he is going to sell the vette and buy a newer one because he "needs a cool car" I guess i sorta get it though- now that it is nice out, i do find myself missing my mustang on sunny days- i drive around and it feels like i see mustangs everywhere i go, but there is NO way sawyer would have fit in the backseat of that car. And the corvette is SO fun to drive-i mean, the handful of times i have driven it have been a blast- even more fun than the mustang because its so low, and with the roof off- amazingness! Its amazing that he has been gone almost as long as the amount of time we were good friends with him- but he still impacts our lives, but in a good way! He was a great friend, always so much fun and we will never the time that we spent with him!